18 Weeks: "To sleep; perchance to dream"

Like I said in my previous post, I'm starting to post on Sundays instead of Wednesdays because my date was changed up a few days.

Growing larger. Starting to feel some small movements every now and again. Not quite as exhausted (thanks iron pills...).

But, sleeping is getting sporadic. Dreams are weird! Last week I dreamt that Aaron and I were running away from the Nazis. We were hiding, but not very well, because I couldn't get Aaron to stop throwing up.  The next night I dreamt that I was trying to mash up bananas for a baby and Aaron had this huge cat, like dog sized, and he was putting in on my head. Needless to say, I was not amused.  For those of you who don't know, I am not a cat person--at all.  Having a cat on my head in real life would make me quite upset. In my dream I was on the floor in a fetal position with my bowl of mashed bananas trying to tell Aaron I wasn't amused. I needed to feed the baby.  So crazy!

Each night I have no idea if I'm going to make it through the night without a trip to the bathroom (One night it was 4 times! I don't even know how that is possible).  Some nights I fall right back to sleep, but more often than not I start planning, thinking, etc.  In the middle of the night I made a plan to label my cupboards for when I have help after the babies are born--good idea.  I entered a sweepstakes for a year's worth of free diapers--good luck. I made my lesson plans for the week--not necessary in the middle of the night! I just sit there and hope to fall back to sleep.

Next ultrasound is in 2 weeks. This will hopefully be the last with the specialist. Hopefully, because that means things are going well.  I'm feeling OK, depending on the day.  Parent-teacher conferences this week.  I may have a different opinion about my feelings by Friday!

Thanks for all of the support and encouragement that has come from writing this blog. I wasn't expecting the outpouring and it's been truly wonderful.

17 Weeks: Untitled

I couldn't think of a great title for this week; just not quite in the creative mood tonight. :-)  I'm actually a little over 17 weeks. After my last visit, they bumped the date just a bit. So, this means I will try to start updating on Sundays instead of Wednesdays to be better on track.

I loved my OB doctor that I saw this week. He was so informative and encouraging.  I got some iron supplements to help with the tiredness I'm feeling and he helped me try to consider whether to try for a VBAC or a c-section.  I know he can't predict, and he said as much, but he did tell me I could very likely make it all the way to 38 weeks.  Not sure if that was good news or bad news! Ha! Good news for the babes, a little dreadful for me.

I had Monday off from teaching and so decided to be pro-active and make a meal plan for the week, including starting the meals. I cooked all of the ground beef I'd need and put it into baggies. I ran out of steam and didn't make it to the grocery store to pick up the rest of the ingredients! I ordered the rest of the ingredients off of Coborns Delivers instead. Love this company. They dropped off my groceries at my front door while I was working and tonight I came home with everything ready to go. Yay!

I don't have much inspiration or deep thoughts to share this week. It's just a completely different pregnancy than a singleton pregnancy. I can't believe how different I feel (tired and sore and achy).  I'm hanging in there, but I still have quite a ways to go!

Next update on Sunday!

16 Weeks: "You are so lucky"

After telling friends, family, even strangers that I am pregnant with twins, the reactions have ranged from complete shock, surprise (always surprise), and various levels of congratulations.  However, when I was dropping Elliot off at daycare, my daycare provider exclaimed over and over, "You are so lucky. You are so lucky!"

I've been thinking about her response and seeing her idea of 'luck' really meaning blessed.  "You are so blessed. You are so blessed!"  Yes, we are so blessed.  The excitement is rolling in amidst the questions and the excitement is taking over the anxiety, because truly we are blessed to be on this journey.

This week has been full of large and small blessings.  I'm still tired. I guess I can't blame my body after standing and walking, bending and squatting, in this profession called middle school teaching. Then, coming home to three rowdy boys, mouths to feed, and a house to maintain. Let's be honest though, Aaron has been doing most of the house maintaining!  It's tiring.

We received two homemade meals this week from my sister-in-law, and my sister just offered to make us a meal once a week.  I almost didn't want to say yes, because what happens when we are at 30 weeks or when we are in the throes of infant hood? But, we are blessed to have family that cares all along the way and I am so grateful.

My ultrasound with the perinatal specialist went great, another blessing.  The technician was so funny, calling the babies Peanut A and Peanut B.  She kept our secret of the genders for us.  Both are healthy. Baby A measured in around 6 ounces and Baby B around 5 ounces.  All their little hands and feet, heart and brain, etc were functioning and in working condition. It was fun to see them moving around.

More things I learned:

• Baby A and Baby B shouldn't be more than 20% different in size. This happens when the umbilical cord is attached to the side of the placenta instead of the middle (in the case of Baby B).  They'll watch the smaller baby all along and then decide what to do if the size difference increases. So far, we're good. 
• I need to produce 5X the amount of insulin! A singleton pregnancy needs 3X.  This could likely mean gestational diabetes... could mean this. There is no way of knowing yet as I was able to produce enough for my previous kids, so we don't know if I can keep up with 5X yet. 
• The placentas work harder (I have 2), which means the doctors will keep a closer eye on these too.  This makes my due date really 38 weeks, rather than 40.  So.... new date is June 12!  Could be earlier too, obviously. 
• Something to think about... I can still do a vaginal birth if I go into labor naturally. I had assumed a c-section based on my past experiences, but the doctor said it's different because the babies are smaller, Baby A is larger and will "pave the way" for Baby B (Baby A is always the lower baby).  I hadn't even considered this... 

We are so lucky. We are so blessed.

15 Weeks

The tiredness of the first trimester has let up...a little.  Just a little.  I went back to work on January 4 and that day was exhausting! So much tightness and cramping. I put my feet up on our recliner from the moment I got home until I went to bed. What would I do without my amazing husband who ran the entire house of 3 crazy boys?

Speaking of Aaron, he's been a single dad for much of each evening. He cleans, he plays, he does the laundry, and puts the kids to bed.  Over and over again.  Then, here am I, propping my feet up and trying to hobble around after giving most of my energy to my students. It doesn't seem fair somehow.  I think I'm going to try and figure out how to rearrange my classroom desks so I can basically sit and teach--with 7th graders we'll see!

Things I've learned this week:
1. I have a di/di pregnancy, which is the least risky of twin pregnancies. This just means that the little ones have their own amniotic sac and their own placentas.  Does it mean they are fraternal? Maybe. Maybe not.

2. I should be drinking 64oz of water a day... yeah. I tried that and I ran to the bathroom so many times throughout the day I think my students will need to end up teaching themselves.

3. My target delivery date is 38 weeks, but I've read this is most likely earlier. Who knows? This is the part that probably has me most anxious. Will I be on bed rest? Will I go early? How early is too early? What are those little guys doing in there to stay safe, grow strong, and keep developing well? What do I do to make sure this happens?

4.  This blog I read gave me this tips that I am planning to try:

• feed the babies at the same time, even if it means waking one up.
• keep enough bottles for an entire day (nurse or not... post for another day), then wash them in the dishwasher while you are "sleeping." 
• trade feedings at night with spouse; feed alone, but get to sleep just a tad bit more.  
• take help--all help you can get and try to keep a list of things people can do to help.  

The shock is starting to wear off and my planning brain has begun... to continue ceaselessly until the babies are born, well probably forever now!

"It looks like there are two in here!"

The first surprise was finding out we were pregnant. After a house full of 3 boys, a 4th child, although a surprise, was going to be OK.  I'd never had an unplanned pregnancy, the feelings of uncertainty and processing the future felt different, but I was still excited.

It was week 11 when I went for a routine dating ultrasound.  I went alone, knowing it was easier with Aaron at home with the kids. And really, we'd confirm the date, I'd get to see the little arm and leg stubs wiggling around and fall in love with that little baby.

The technician had barely begun moving her probe around my belly when she paused, saying, "Well, it looks like there are two in here; I'll just have to change your chart here before we move on."

"What?!?!"

I'm sure if I hadn't been gooped up with ultrasound goo and laying on the bed, I would have jumped up.  After my initial outburst, I got quiet and even more quiet, if that was possible.  Watching those two little babies bumping into one another was both amazingly incredible and unbelievably overwhelming.

Since then, I can't believe this journey of ours! It sometimes feels like this is all I think about. My mind won't stop racing with the endless lists and questions of what this pregnancy and life will be like.

I've learned that this pregnancy is so different than previous. What I think I know, I don't.  I. Am. Tired. So. Tired.  The aches and pains usually reserved for 3rd trimester have already begun.

I've learned that I'll be off to see the the OB/GYN, mixed in with a specialist, mixed in with many, many ultrasounds.

So many questions, not too many answers, but a peace is coming as we prepare for these two precious little babies growing steadily.  Praise God for his sovereignty. He called us to this noble task. Without Him, it would feel impossible, with Him, we will thrive (even in our bleary eyed days ahead--how will we sleep?!?).